It was due to a misunderstanding, nothing more. No grand attempt to squash a child’s creative spirit or make her fit into a too-small box. No systemic plan to marginalize her. No bullying, no unkind words. And yet, I just watched a tiny piece of my daughter get crushed. And I cried. I was prepared… Continue Reading
a woven tapestry
Category Archives: Ruminations
Lost in Limbo
Last week, the kids told me they learned how to limbo at school. Even backwards, they reported, proudly. I used to wonder why that game was called limbo, but I think I know now. That feeling of bending back and forth, moving unsteadily, as far as you can, knowing that at some point you might… Continue Reading
Healing
The way I’d imagined it, I would have my first baby while I was in grad school, as a couple of other friends had done. It was a welcoming department, and I planned to be be the kind of mom who brought my baby to class or a lecture, nursed as needed, rocked and swayed, took notes and asked questions. Life would go on, I imagined, not unchanged but certainly enriched.… Continue Reading
until that day
There will come a day when I can’t fix every problem. When my simple ministrations are not enough. When my hug and kiss doesn’t set the world back on course. There will come a day when I am banished, not sought. When I am a hindrance, not a help. When I annoy more than I… Continue Reading
Intertwining
For many years, I kept my online life and my “real” life separate. I wrote under a pseudonym. I was careful about disclosing my location or any specifics about my life or my family online. I was careful about disclosing my blog and blog identity offline. Initially, I needed that freedom – that protected space… Continue Reading
Finding My Voice
When I began blogging, it was an outlet for the thoughts swirling around my head. Back then, it was a safe place to vent about infertility, to write about family, to explore hopes and dreams. The first time I remember blogging as an outlet was at a family event early in the medicalized process of… Continue Reading
New Beginnings
Spring is a season of new beginnings. A time when plants come back to life from their winter rest (at least if you live someplace colder than our current balmy Southern California) and birds nest (some of them right outside my dining room window). And apparently, a time to start a fresh blog.